The Female means Trouble
by CaelumChibi
Summary: A dream can be frustrating, Who's meaningless now? 2nd story following the 'Casanova plot'. A NCIS/CASANOVA CROSSOVER featuring Tony Dinozzo and Casanova. OneShot written for thing-a-thon & prompt Meaningless. Warning: T/Z,T/C,T/MG slash lemony stuf


_AU- And here it is! The second story following the famous 'Casanova' plot that I've just invented one day ago. Also written for the NCISshared thing-a-thong with the Prompt Meaningless. Crossover! Read it and Enjoy! _

Fandoms: NCIS; Casanova  
Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS or Casanova. But I do own a Tony look-a-like XD;;... I wish ;  
Warnings: LEMONY stuff in here! So under 18? Don't read! Also Slash!  
Pairings: Tony/Ziva ; Tony/Casanova ; Tony/McGee  
Summary: A dream can be frustrating, Who's meaningless now? 2nd story following the 'Casanova plot'.  
Status: **One-shot Finished**

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**The Female Means Trouble **

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"Yeah, Just like that." Tony moaned.

He had made himself comfortable in his chair and was leaning backward with his head resting in his hands.

"Good one." He kept on moaning with his eyes closed.

"What's he doing?" Ziva asked at the far end of the room to McGee.

"Daydreaming." He replied.

"Obviously." Ziva said settling herself behind her desk. The two of them started working while they tried to ignore Tony's moans as his daydream seemed to get better with the second.

"That's it baby. A little bit lower…"

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Tony was standing in a beautifully decorated garden full of fresh flowers. His left hand was resting on a young woman's hip while his right hand was occupied caressing her inner thigh. "Good one." He moaned when the girl suddenly bent over and kissed him on the lips before she softly pushed his hands away and went down on her knees. "That's it baby. A little bit lower…" Tony watched her with anticipation. "Don't be so hasty." The girl answered him with a husky voice. Her eyes were like dark pools dripping with lust. "You know I'll do anything for you." She added. Tony groaned when she unzipped his pants and began to pull his trousers down. 

"Yeah," he murmured back, "That would be the first time." He shivered when he felt her hot breath coming closer to his member.

"Ziva." He whimpered and couldn't suppress a shiver from excitement.

"You're quite a Casanova, did you know that?" The hot breath tingled and a tongue touched his dick. "That's why I like you so much."

He grinned.

A hand firmly gripped his shoulder and forced him to turn around. He yelped when he was suddenly face to face with another man. "Doctor who!" Tony cried out in surprise but the man in front of him frowned.

"You called yourself what?" The other man asked, but his face showed a frown and betrayed his confusion. He looked Tony deep in the eye and Tony began to sweat drop.

"Look here, mister. I really mean no trouble." Tony started blabbering. He suddenly didn't know what to do and whether what he saw was true.

Wait! Was Ziva still there? Tony turned away from the young man just in time to see Ziva lurch around the corner and disappear from view. Tony opened his mouth to call out for her but it was as if she had been reading his mind as she cried out for the two of them to have fun. Were his ears deceiving him?

"Listen." The other man started again and Tony turned back to face him. "I don't know who that doctor of yours is, but I mean you no harm." The other man replied passionately. "Now I'll ask you again, What did you just call yourself?"

"But you really do look like that same man who played Doctor who. The tenth one." Tony stuttered, his mind was foggy as he was browsing through all the information of movies he had ever seen. "Than that would be a very lucky man." His thoughts were interrupted by the male in front of him. "Because he would resemble the one and only Casanova!" Casanova smiled happily after saying this and put his hands on his hips making a very proud pose.

'He must have had the same actor then.' Tony concluded silently before he reached out to shake Casanova's hand. "My name is Tony Dinozzo and I must confess it's a real honour to meet you." He said before bowing as to show his admiration. Casanova smiled back at him before he bowed himself, just out of respect. "And I am indeed flattered that you've finally come to understand who I am." Tony scratched his head.

"So you really are Casanova? I mean, The real Casanova?"

"I am indeed the 'real' Casanova." Casanova confirmed. "Just as you are the 'real' Tony Dinozzo." Casanova's eyes roamed over his form and Tony began to feel a bit uncomfortable under his gaze.

"That's nice." Tony said while he started to back away. He got more and more nervous as Casanova didn't stop looking at him with that somewhat satisfied smile of his.

"Girls." Casanova tusked. "I can't seem to get enough of them." Tony nodded at him in agreement. "But after all, they are just meaningless to me." Tony frowned.

This wasn't the Casanova he knew from the stories, this Casanova was just frightening him to death.

"And they should be meaningless to you too." The young lover continued, all his attention was still on Tony. "Girls become meaningless," he paused there to lick his upper lip in a very sensual way, "when a man can get a man like you to be his lover."

"Hold on!" Tony said, his hands waving in front of him helplessly, but Casanova already lunged forward, arms spread, and hugged him tight. Tony struggled to get out of the man's grip but only managed to turn around so he was now standing with his back towards Casanova.

The young lover didn't release the strong hold he had on the special agent but instead let one of his hands travel down Tony's body until it reached a special area. "God no!" Tony exclaimed as soon as he realised what Casanova's intentions were. Casanova began to fondle Tony's genitals slowly. 'I'm not gay.' Tony thought desperately at the new sensation that was rushing through his body. 'If McGee caught me like this he would be laughing his head of for centuries.' The hot ragged breath that touched his neck made him shiver. He was actually getting excited by all of this. 'I need to find a way to get out of this situation or things might end up pretty messy.' Then it hit him. "I'm sorry," he panted out, "But you see, my girlfriend is waiting for me to finish the job and I think it's only fair if I should tend to her first because, ah" Casanova had started to nibble on his earlobe and had tightened the grip on Tony's member, "Because she was here first." Tony finally managed to say. Casanova was now sucking Tony's neck but he briefly raised his head.

"She's gone." Casanova had just stated the obvious.

"Perhaps now is a good time to put my little fellow back where he belongs." Tony remarked. He immediately regretted it when he felt Casanova smile against his skin.

"Hey! Your not that small!" Casanova returned to him deeply offended.

Tony grinned at that. "I know." He said before patting Casanova's hand that was still fondling his lower part. "In fact, the sight of your prick makes me lust for you even more. It's just so huge." Casanova panted in his ear, his hot breath causing a tingling sensation. Then suddenly his tongue flicked out to lick Tony's earlobe and Tony closed his eyes. He secretly prayed for a hero to rescue him. Anyone, he didn't care whom would save him.

"I'm sorry, I think there must be some misunderstanding." A stern voice said. Casanova ceased his actions and Tony could feel that the other man was peering over his shoulder. "I thought I had an appointment with Tony today." Nothing happened. "He's my butt-pall." Casanova let go of Tony who immediately began to zip his trousers while grumbling a low "Thank you, Probie."

"You're welcome." McGee said before saluting to the other man with a short nod.

"Well, we're off." The rescuer said.

"I'm never watching Casanova movies again in my whole life." Tony swore before grabbing McGee's hand and following him to go as far away from Casanova as he could possibly be.

Casanova sighed heavily even as he watched Tony disappear in the distance. He just stood there for a while before he opened up his pants again and examined his hard member. "No luck today." He huffed to himself. At the same time a bizarre thought popped into his mind.

'How will Probie's member look like?'

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"Tony!" Someone was shouting near his ear. Tony quickly opened his eyes to find Ziva and McGee standing at his desk. "Did you just dreamt that I saved you?" McGee asked dumbfounded. Tony shifted to the front of his chair and noticed he was wet. Had he been sweating? As if Ziva could read his mind she answered his question. "It looked like you were having a nightmare just now. We've already brought you a glass of water." 

McGee handed the glass to Tony who now looked at McGee with a frown on his face.

"McGee, have you ever heard of the word 'Butt-pall' before?"

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_AU- Recognise the plot? See the differences? _


End file.
